The New Year is nearly here. It's the time when many will turn away from the past to focus on the possibilities that 2023 could bring.
Here come the New Year's resolutions: I will soon be thinner, richer and a less nicotine-addicted version of myself. Right?
Resolutions are notoriously difficult to keep because it can be very difficult to make real changes in our lives. So many people abandon their resolutions that a fitness app called Strava has reportedly dubbed the second Friday in January “Quitter’s day” after analyzing its user activities.
But the problem is not us, said Dr. Sarah Benuska, counseling psychologist at MetroHealth. Many New Year’s resolutions bite the dust because when it comes to making long-lasting changes, many of us are doing it wrong, she said.
“There is that challenge of like, I'm going to make this big change and it's going to be so great and so awesome," she said. "But then it's really hard to stick with and then you just end up feeling bad about not being able to stick with it.”
We are more likely to succeed by making small incremental, sustainable changes that still allow us to fulfill our other responsibilities, Benuska said.
For example, if you’re goal is to be healthier, maybe decide to take one fitness class a week. Pick something you’ll enjoy because you’ll be more likely to go back, she said.
It's also time to rethink failure, Benuska said. Consider a typical reaction to slipping up while trying to change ones eating habits:
"If you're able to get back on track, then you still have some gains made," Benuska said. "You don't undo everything by one misstep."
That's not how things work, she said.
"I think we need to give ourselves a little bit of grace with not being perfect," she added.
Part of succeeding is setting reasonable goals. Trying to eat better? Set a specific, achievable goal — maybe try to have vegetables three times in the next two weeks, Benuska said.
To achieve your goals you should also think about what you can give up, said Pat Schultz, a success coach in Cleveland.
If you’re going to get more exercise that might mean giving up TV time on Wednesday nights; If you want to go on vacation, that could mean cutting out Starbucks or buying new clothes, she said.
"We have to be very careful how we spend our time and our money so that it is going toward what we really want and not what we're used to doing or having in our routine life," Schultz said.
Also, there’s nothing magical about Jan. 1, she added. You can set a goal or a resolution whenever you want.
